When I see a bird that walks like a duck and swims like a duck and quacks like a duck, I call that bird a duck.

I think I missed something.  At what point did having duck lips become sexy?  I’m not talking naturally full, plump lips . . . like Angelina Jolie. 

I’m talking people who inject crap . . . and I mean crap . . . into their lips.  From fat transfers from one point on the patient’s body to make their lips fat, to donor tissue extracted from cadavers . . . that’s dead people folks . . .  to collagen.  Collagen sounds like the least offensive but did you know that collagen is extracted from cow hides . . . that would be dead cows folks.  Just sayin’.

And I don't think I'm exaggerating when I'm comparing these lip jobs to duck bills . . . 

Go ahead . . . tell me I'm wrong!

Anyhoo . . . is this sexy?

Or this?  

Seriously, is this sexy??  Just askin'.

(And, yes, that's a dude.)